The Big Comb Over by J.P. Rieger

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Do you have any phobias?

Yes, I don’t like having open windows without screens. Although I love nature, I believe it needs to stay safely outside, where it belongs. I’m a little phobic about birds and annoying insects blundering their way into the house. Seems to me that an open, screenless, window is as good as an engraved invitation to a bird, bat, bee, mosquito, etc. Pigeons are particularly troubling. Unless these creatures are paying rent, they need to stay outside.

Do you listen to music when you're writing?

No. I love music and whenever I hear it, it grabs my attention away from writing. I have a hard time focusing on writing if music is playing in the background.

First book you remember making an indelible impression on you.

Probably an anthology of Edgar Allan Poe stories that my mother allowed me to read when I was around nine or ten. Poe’s The Tell-Tale Heart was a gateway drug to all of his other incredible stories. Some were difficult to read at that age but others like The Gold Bug or The Purloined Letter, quickly became favorites.

What comes first, the plot or characters?

That’s a tricky one! I think plot. Most of my stories start with an idea for a plot. Then, I see what kind of characters could fit the plot. On the other hand, occasionally, the nature of the character makes creating a plot easy. For example, in The Big Comb Over, Roland, who’s obsessed with his hair (as I am) undertakes a quest in London to find more dry shampoo.

Who designed the book cover for the book you are touring?

I am a fan of Pop Art luminary, Roy Lichtenstein. Lichtenstein embraced a vintage comic book style in his works. For my second novel, Clonk!, I hired an illustrator to create the appearance of a vintage comic book, basically, a policeman’s cap with the book title in the dialog balloon. For The Big Comb Over, I went retro comic again, with the same illustrator. I had an idea that the front cover image could be a person reading The Big Comb Over, with tears of either joy or sorrow. (Let the reader decide.) Because there is a French connection (sorry Mr. Hackman) in the story, I decided to make the character’s version of the book appear in French. The text, “La Grande Coiffure Marée Basse,” means “The Big Hairstyle at Low Tide.” “Low tide” is apparently one way to articulate the look of the comb over in French as there doesn’t appear to be an exact translation.

Three nephews and three eccentric uncles.

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It’s 2050 and Robbie Elders has all but forgotten about his oddball, religious fanatic uncle, tim tim. He’s taken up the latest fad, genealogical research based solely on DNA. But Robbie’s “inconclusive” DNA results are unsettling. He crashes back to his childhood, back to his world of comic books and tim tim.

“I opt for posh and London” declares Lady Florence Stour. It’s 2019 and time for a Royal Wedding. Robbie’s uncle, Stef, is engaged to Lady Florence, a distant member of the British royal family. Stef’s Baltimore clan have been invited, but Robbie’s mom and dad can’t attend. They’ve entrusted Robbie and big brother, Doyle, to their mom’s two eccentric brothers, uncles Roy and Roland. Roy, a weathered waterman with a severe Baltimore accent, lives for Maryland blue crabs. Roland, a mildly hypochondriacal actor, lives to survive the Karens he unavoidably encounters. And then there’s Desales, Roy’s smart aleck, teenage son. He lives to prank. They’ve descended upon London. What could possibly go wrong?

Meanwhile, tim tim has been coaching Robbie on “the mission.” A silly religious fantasy according to Robbie’s atheist parents and the therapists. Or perhaps not? Things are not always as they appear in The Big Comb Over.

Read an Excerpt

He was thinking that the man’s accent could be Irish. But more Cockney, almost. Odd. He saw the man thrust his hand forward.

“Name’s Roy.” He shook Roy’s hand, earnestly.

“Name’s Dixon. Pleasure to meet you.” He glanced over at Roy’s suit. “Nice couture! A refreshing play on seersucker! ‘Maison Dixon’ is mine. Curious to hear about yours!”

Roy felt a bit confused. He had already introduced himself. He figured maybe those white things were hearing aids. And he had a crazy name. “Ya said yours is Mason Dixon?”

“Yes!”

“Like your Mason-Dixon line?”

“Well, thank you, Roy! Which particular line do you favor?”

Roy felt confused again. “Favor? Well, I was thinkin’ of the long one? The old one?”

Bertram nodded, knowingly. Nice to know the “Smart Man” line was still revered. Teddy had been encouraging him to drop it. “Yes, Smart Man, a long and successful line.”

Roy nodded. “Why, thanks, Mr. Dixon. But I would reckon everbody ’roun here’s heard of it. Don’t take too much brains. Historical, like.”

“Brilliant! Thanks, Roy. That’s my job. To keep those lines out in the public’s mind.”

Roy scratched at his rusty beard stubble. “So, like, ya do surveys, still? Ta mark the lines?”

“Well, certainly. But those are a little old school. We don’t always attach a survey to each line we produce. We get things done more with social media. Influencers, mainly. Good judges of the zeitgeist.”

Roy was thinking that surveyors setting lines without surveys didn’t sound very safe. And he wasn’t sure about the rest. “Ya done anything here in Bawlmer? Any new ones?” Roy had been shopping at that new supermarket in Middle River. He wanted to make sure the building was safe. He was hoping Mr. Dixon’s company was not involved.

About the Author: J. Paul (J.P.) Rieger is a born and bred Baltimorean and mostly retired Maryland attorney. As such, he’s well acquainted with the quirkiness and charm of Baltimore’s unique citizens. He’s author of Clonk!, a police farce set in Baltimore and published in 2023 by Apprentice House Press (Loyola University-Baltimore). He’s also author of The Case Files of Roderick Misely, Consultant, a mystery novel featuring a wannabe lawyer anti-hero. The Big Comb Over, a slipstream comedy of manners featuring three nephews and their three eccentric uncles, is Paul’s third novel. Paul is married and lives in Towson, Maryland.

Website: http://www.jpaulrieger.net

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